I just read an article about setting limits for teens. This article talks about how deep down teenagers actually want limits, instead of being free to do whatever they want, whenever they want. It makes teens feel like they have some kind of parental protection and that they are cared about by their parents. I have never really thought about this before, but I guess it's true for me. If my parents didn't care if hung out with the wrong group of friends or had flunking grades, then I would feel like they don't care about me. By setting limits my parents are showing me that care enough about to me stop me from making bad decisions. Also, they are doing me a favor to avoid future trouble and failure.
But at the same time parents can't have too many limits, they have to give their teens some choices. That way teens will be more likely to obey the limits their parents set. If my parents had an insane amount of rules, I definitely would have more of a tendency to break them, then if they didn't have as many. For example, if I had a friend my parents really didn't like and they were consistently telling me they hate her and don't want me to have any contact with her, then I would probably hang out with her more. If my parents would've said I don't think you should be hanging out with this person, she could have a negative effect on you, then I would have probably realized it myself and after awhile the friendship would die out on its own. But my parents strictly forbidding the friendship would make me want to keep being friends with her because my parents are so strongly against it.
Parents should find an equal balance between having too many limits and not enough. That way teens can make the best out of their teen years without getting into a lot of unnecessary situations.
1 comment:
This is a great post! I feel like my parents set a good amount of rules for me, if they set more i would want to rebel, and if they set less I really would feel like they didn't care about what I did. This article also reminds me of the one i wrote last week about teens, drugs, and drinking. I feel that if doing drugs was legal, less people would do it because you don't feel like as much of a rebel. Just like how you said if your parents didn't set any rules, you probably wouldn't feel the need to be a rebel and do bad things.
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